I am morally opposed to there being glass between me and these puppies (Underlook.org)
Is this updog?
I think this might be my favorite scene from the movie.
I just realized Bucky has never seen aliens before this. He’s only ever dealt with super soldiers and impressive tech. So, you know he wakes up from his lovely cryo nap, they slap a new arm on him, and then they’re like “Here’s an actual god, aliens, and a talking raccoon that wants the arm we literally just gave you after the dude whose parents you killed blew off your last one” and his tired gay ass is just like
What I like best is that the raccoon in new. No one knew a talking raccoon with a machine gun would appear and Bucky is just all “eh. been attacked by a dude with wings. been chased across Berlin by a grown man in a cat suit. been jumped on by a prepubescent spider. I’ve had weirder”
I feel like an adult brain in 2017 processes more information in one morning than an adult brain in 1817 did in one month.
yeah thats why we all have anxiety now
Shrek makes infinitely more sense if you ascribe to the theory that everyone is a PC in an RPG, and Donkey’s player managed to avoid a boss battle by rolling a nat 20 to seduce the fucking dragon
“I want to be a half-ogre.”
“What? You can’t. They’ve seen your picture, and you’re a human.”
“The ogre half is at night.”
“Ok, now it’s time for the boss fight against Farquaad.”
“I have my dragon girlfriend eat Farquaad.”
“…you what?”
“I have my dragon girlfriend-”
“No, no, I heard you the first time. Look, I’m gonna roll a d20 and if it’s a 20 then the dragon will eat Farquaad.”
-dice sounds-
*pinches the bridge of his nose* “Ok, so the boss is fucking dead now.”
By Shrek 2, everything has just gone to shit.
“Okay, so I go in as sexy human Shrek, riding on the shoulder of the giant gingerbread man, and pull down the drawbridge of the castle so I can slip in and crash the fairy god mother’s performance of I Need A Hero. Do I need to roll Endurance to survive boiling milk?”
*DM covers their face with both hands, sobbing* “What the fuck have you assholes done to my campaign!?”
Donkey is the bard who seemingly forgot that their spells require a free hand to cast.
Puss In Boots is the rogue who put all of his points into charisma, probably bribed the DM into letting him be bipedal. Donkey’s player won’t let it go.
The Collector
I’ve seen this several times but I haven’t seen it posted with Zoe’s retweet
she only needs one more before she becomes unstoppable
I’ve reblogged this before, but I don’t care. It still makes me laugh.
I reblogged this 0.2 sec ago but I love her clapbacks so much
Yeah should be doing this more.
I just love how she says “He does not look to be of Native American descent,” lmao.
I love this girl
officialbrandymull
